This Week: 3-11 (6-8 outright)
Season: 43-47-1 (56-36 outright)
I did it! After a few uncharacteristically great weeks to start the season, I’m finally back where I belong: well under .500.
(In all seriousness, this is the worst week of picks I’ve ever had in my life, bar none, and those “uncharacteristic” weeks earlier in the season are usually more representative of how my picks work out. This was a really, really weird week.)
Let me just say in my defense that the games I had right (Lions/Eagles, Giants/49ers, Broncos/Chargers), I had loudly right.
The thing is? I don’t think I could’ve done much better. The only games I legitimately should’ve had different picks in were Kansas City/Tampa Bay (forgot Brady Quinn was taking over the reins for KC) and Minnesota/Washington (“Everybody Believes in Us!” game for Minnesota, and who honestly thought there was any chance RG3 wasn’t playing?) That’s it. Really: that’s it.
Actually, okay… that isn’t it:
Oakland 20, Atlanta 23
I had: Atlanta -9
I should’ve had this one, too. Atlanta is a bunch of underachievers. Everyone is loudly screaming that they’ve “finally figured it out.” Do you know how many blowout victories Atlanta has had this year?
A grand total of none.
I may regret this at a later date, but I think I’ve seen enough of this Falcons team to determine that (perhaps unsurprisingly) they are exactly the team they’ve been for the past few years. For whatever reason, they just do not play nearly as well as they’re capable of playing. Worse, they made Carson Palmer look like a downright servicable quarterback when he was trying his hardest to throw a game-ending interception on nearly every play. Will this always be a highly-talented, underachieving team?
Cincinnati 24, Cleveland 34
I had: Cincinnati -2
Congratulations to Cleveland on making sure they won’t be talked about at all for the rest of the season by taking 0-16 out of play.
St. Louis 14, Miami 17
I had: Miami -4.5
I should just refuse to make picks in games like this. Can I do that? Can we agree as a nation that no one really cares whether Miami beats St. Louis by a field goal or two field goals?
Indianapolis 9, NY Jets 35
I had: Indianapolis +3.5
How in the world did I talk myself into the Colts as a Cinderella team? This team went 2-14 last year! And their most substantial change was to a rookie quarterback! And oh yeah, by the way, they’re playing under an interim head coach!
Let’s just pretend this pick didn’t happen, okay?
Detroit 26, Philadelphia 23 (OT)
I had: Detroit +3.5
These teams really deserved each other.
Kansas City 10, Tampa Bay 38
I had: Kansas City +4
How in the world did I forget Brady Quinn was starting for Kansas City this week? How in the world did I forget Brady Quinn was starting for Kansas City this week??
Dallas 29, Baltimore 31
I had: Baltimore -3.5
I told you I had a funny feeling about this game…
Buffalo 19, Arizona 16 (OT)
I had: Arizona -4
SEE what happens when a stoppable force meats a movable object!
STARE in awe as Katherine regrets picking Arizona when they’re giving four no matter who their opponent is!
New England 23, Seattle 24
I had: New England -3.5
Okay: the AFC stinks.
NY Giants 26, San Francisco 3
I had: NY Giants +6.5
Called it.
Minnesota 26, Washington 38
I had: Minnesota +2
I would like to thank RG3 for giving the Bears sole possession of first place in the NFC North!
Green Bay 42, Houston 24
I had: Houston -3.5
So, remember when I said there was no clear reason that Green Bay stunk so far this year? They seem to have realized that, too.
And remember when I said Houston wasn’t as good as we thought, especially in light of the Cushing injury?
Geeze, if only I had kept either of these things in mind while making my pick!
Denver 35, San Diego 24
I had: Denver PK
Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football.
Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football.
Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football.
Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football.
Peyton Manning on Monday Night Football.
